What Is Cybersex and How Is It a Form of Sex Addiction

The most common definition of cybersex is a virtual sexual encounter between two or more people using the Internet. It can involve people viewing each other over a webcam or communicating via text based messages, instant messaging, webcam, voice, Skype, either in a chat room, on a message board, using a video service, through instant messaging or through an email system.

Some have expanded the term to include online pornography, but for us, the definition given above will be our frame of reference. Since the people involved are often miles or even continents apart, of course no actual sex occurs and what happens is technically considered masturbation.

There is nothing inherently wrong with cybersex itself, and can be a way for long-distance couples to connect on a more intimate level than previous technology would allow. But it rises to the level of sex addiction when a person is doing it compulsively, using it to suppress negative emotions and perhaps replace them with false feelings of intimacy and love. A healthy adult can cut back on online sexual behavior if it threatens relationships, causes them problems or takes over large portions of their life. A person suffering from an addiction may use the Internet to fill his or her needs and cannot reign in the behavior.

People, either with an addiction or without, exhibit all manner of sexual preferences and needs. A person with sex addiction seeking physical gratification may be content to masturbate to online pornography, and one seeking physical contact along with that gratification may go to prostitutes or visit a number of consensual partners.

In terms of the level of intimacy and social interaction required, cybersex is one step above masturbating to pornography and one below visiting a prostitute. Even within the behavior itself are a range of intimacy levels. A chat room that uses only text is the least intimate of a person’s online options. The sex addict knows there is a real person on the other keyboard interacting with them in real time, but they may not know each others’ names, physical appearance, gender or anything else except for what they write on a screen. A certain level of detachment is preserved, and there is room for fantasy still. A chat room or text message board is usually where a cybersex-based sex addiction will start.

In the chat room, pictures may be exchanged between the parties and can then segue into the use of voice chats, phone sex and or webcams. This does not mean the people involved have kept the same partners during the transition. Cybersex has the added lure of providing multiple sex partners with whom the addict can have casual, sexual encounters to fuel his fantasies.

A more problematic aspect of this particular addiction is the heightened level of intimacy it provides for an addict, something beyond traditional pornography viewing. With sex addiction, rational thought can be overridden by the desire to fill the need, which in these cases can be something beyond physical sex. Perhaps two people engage in behavior with each other more often than they do others. One or both may feel a bond forming, however this bond will be based on filling sexual needs and not involve other aspects of a healthy relationship. To a person with a sex addiction, this bond will feel real, and just as real feeling does, it will cause pain when it inevitably comes apart. This leaves the sex addict with more negative emotions which he will then suppress with yet more addictive behavior.

Other issues that can crop up with a cybersex-based sex addiction are the same ones that can be seen in anyone with any kind of sex addiction problem. Spending large portions of time, more than 10 hours per week online participating in sexual behavior, is a sign there could be a problem. The person putting off work or other activities in order to engage in online sex act is also an indicator. Of course a spouse or romantic partner may not see much of a difference between cybersex and real sex and consider it an infidelity.

Cybersex can expose a sex addict to more concerning problems as well. While it is important to remember not all sex addicts are sex offenders, the nature of it lends itself to those who are disposed to experimentation. An addict can pretend to be whoever he wants to be online or find someone pretending to be, or who actually is, a minor. A person in control of his or herself can avoid legal problems, but a person with sex addiction may not.

9 Tips For Mastering Date Chatting in Chat Rooms With Webcam

Almost all chat room with webcam, or not is a potential for dating, flirting of some sort, or just connecting with people. Flirting is just a single way of showing someone that you are interested in them without having to tell them directly, and you can do it in chat rooms. Flirting and date chatting online at chat rooms with webcam, is becoming a craze all over the world, and which everyone from every age level seem to be following.

Date Chatting with webcam is the way to go if you are seeking romance or new friends. You can now get an actual and real feel for the person who you are talking to much quicker than you would via email or ordinary internet messaging.

Here are some of the tips for you to be successful in date chatting :

1. Be careful of who you interact with.

Someone who seems like they have a dry sense of humour may in fact have no sense of humour at all in person!
And someone who seems your ideal person via chat webcams may have the most irritating voice, looks, and behavior in the world!

2. You can rebuff people who you don’t like.
Without worrying about doing it right to their face, just close your conversation window, or even block the person!

Also, you should also know the common abbreviations and as we say, chat lingo. Here’s a list of some of the abbreviations :

ASL – Age/Sex/Location

HAK – Hugs And Kisses

KISS – Keep It Simple Stupid

SWF – Single White Female

SWM – Single White Male

GTG – Got To Go

TBD – To Be Discussed

That’s all for now!

Check out my article below to find out more of the following :

1. My full list of tips to master online date chatting with webcam.

2. More detailed chat abbreviation and acronyms.

3. The best and leading resource with chat rooms with webcam.

How to Get a Girl! (To Date Or For Fun and Games)

Instead of staying at home, wishing the girl of your dreams would come to your door, why don’t you take a look at how to get a girl of your very own, every time you try. It really isn’t that difficult if you know what girls look for and what they want out of their man.

It starts by looking in a full length mirror from top to bottom. Girls like a guy who dresses sharply and cares about his appearance. That means losing the sneakers for a nice pair of leather loafers, dressing in tight fitting jeans, a nice pair of khakis or even a nice pair of dress pants. Top this off with a nice button-down shirt, a tie if appropriate to the occasion, a nicely ironed knit shirt or a turtleneck, depending on the season. If it’s not too hot, wear a blazer that goes with the pants, although a matching suit and tie would be only for very fancy occasions. You’ll learn how to get a girl every time if you pay attention to your attire.

Then let’s take a look at your hygiene. Do you have a strong-enough deodorant and do you have a fragrance you can wear that will remind her of you always but won’t be do overwhelming? If you have facial hair, keep it trimmed neatly and keep up with your haircuts. If you don’t have facial hair, shave regularly so you don’t look scruffy. You won’t be able to learn how to get a girl if hygiene takes the back burner in your life.

Now that you’ve prepared for the occasion, think a little bit about where you’re going. Do you have a date already and you’re just trying to finally snag her? If so, bring along something special, such as roses or a nice corsage. Think about what she might like in terms of chocolates, truffles or just flowers and don’t forget to buy them fresh on the way to pick her up. If you don’t know who you’re going to see or you’re just trolling for girls, you don’t have to bring along anything but your charm.

The guys that know how to get a girl know that listening to a girl is as important as talking to her. Be interested in her life and in what she has to say, ask appropriate questions and sidle up next to her as if she’s the most fascinating woman in the world. Say bits and pieces about yourself but don’t be evasive if she asks you outright questions about you and your life. Maintain eye contact as much as possible and by all means, look just as much at her face as you do to her cleavage. Complement her on her look and let her know you’re interested in her.

Knowing how to get a girl is not rocket science; it’s a matter of having the right look and conversing in such a way that she knows you care.